Design that pokes you in the eye with a sharp stick is design I can get behind
Anyone who knows me IRL knows that I have a relationship with time that requires heavy reliance on the prefix “over-” to describe it.
Immediately springing to mind would be the words “overwrought” and “overheated” because I am nothing if not punctilious about punctuality. And that’s putting it mildly. My need to get where I’m going ON TIME is fiery hot, oh indeed it is. Really. Ask my children how often my getting-there math has gone like this: “Okay, we need to be there at 11:00. If there’s no problem with the streetcar, that should take us half an hour. But if there’s a problem with the streetcar we’ll be late and oh my god I hate to be late. So we’re gonna give ourselves 50 minutes to get there. And hopefully we won’t be late.” And then we’re 29 minutes early because not only did I apply an overly generous pouf of making-up-for-travel-travails padding but my original estimate of travel-time was overly pessimistic. Really, my soulmate in this one regard is the long-dead David Redesdale, father of the famous Mitford sisters. According to one of his writer daughters, when waiting for someone to keep an appointment with him, Lord Redesdale would grow restive and belligerent 15 minutes before the person was actually due, growling, “Damn sewer’s going to be
late if he doesn’t get here soon.” Bahahhaha! And that describes all too well my own very fraught relationship with time.
So imagine my reaction when, while browsing at www.dezeen.com this morning, I came across the Cyclops watch by Mr Jones Watches. This is what the write-up on the maker’s website
says about this pretty object: “Cyclops dispenses with a conventional arrangement of hour, minute and second hands; instead a single hour marker passes around the coloured dial. Each hour is represented by a different coloured circle, the black hoop gradually passes over each circle to indicate the time. Cyclops can be read with a relaxed kind of accuracy that offers a counterpoint to our hectic modern lives.” OMG! That “relaxed kind of accuracy” thing made me LOL. Because seriously? A watch that only sort of
tells you what time it is? That’s funny! And also clearly sent from the devil himself to torment a woman like me. Then again, if we view my hyper-punctuality as a disease (as surely we should) then the Cyclops watch may be seen as a dose of delicious rainbow-flavoured medicine.
Really, this is the kind of design I love best. It’s design that functions with a different functionality than what you’d expect, design that yanks the carpet out from under your feet, maddening and enchanting, all at once. And as soon as I’ve got an extra 200 bucks lying around, I’m buying one of those suckers. Fo sho. Meanwhile, I need to begin calculations for this morning’s two-block journey to the Y.